The key signs he’s not that into you

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You won’t want to hear these, we know. But in the interests of understanding when it’s time to walk away, you need to learn the clear signs he’s not that into you.

If he’s not, so what? Time to move on and find someone who is. Yes, it will hurt, but it’s certainly not a reflection on you.

1. You always reach out first

If he’s into you, he will reach out. Even if he is nervous or busy, he will make time to reach out to you. If you’re always the one making an effort to call or text first, there is a pretty obvious reason for that. If he likes you, no amount of work or stress will prevent him from replying to your text.

2. His actions and words don’t align

A lot of guys are smooth talkers. He may tell you he’s interested or that he’ll take you to a nice dinner or even on vacation, but if it never happens, there’s a reason.

He knows how to say things to make you like him, but if he doesn’t act on it, he isn’t really into you, at least not in the way you’re probably hoping.

3. You’re putting in all the effort

If you’re not only texting first, but you also make all the plans, ask questions to get to know him, and even do nice things for him while he does nothing, he is more interested in the convenience and what you have to offer.

4. He flakes on plans

Do your plans always seem up in the air? They are never nailed down. Instead, they are always something like, “maybe if I get home early enough.” He is waiting for something better to come along and hanging onto you as a second best.

If you managed to make plans, expect that he will cancel at the last minute. Sometimes things come up, and plans have to change, but if it always happens and he’s never even tried to make it up to you, that’s a sign he isn’t interested.

Of course, this doesn’t say anything about you. Don’t waste your time and energy on someone who would be so disrespectful and wouldn’t make an effort to actually show up.

5. You’re always waiting

He’s always taking hours or days to text you back. You’re the one who always waits for definite plans and an okay that you can come over. He does not respect your time.

He doesn’t think you could possibly have anything better to do than to wait around for him to decide. You deserve to be considered and cared for, not ignored.

6. He doesn’t try to impress you

A guy who is into you will clean up when you’re coming over. He will spray some cologne or wear something a bit nicer than basketball shorts and a stained t-shirt.

If his place is a mess and he’s a mess, but he still expects you to wear makeup, heels, etc., to see him, he is not worth your time. This is one of the key signs he’s not that into you.

7. He doesn’t care what you do

We often hope that if we make a guy like this jealous, he will realize what he has and be jealous or change his ways.

But, if you tell him about the coworker who keeps asking you out or even post photos with another guy and he doesn’t care, it’s because he only wants what he wants from you.

8. It’s all about convenience

A guy who is into you will change plans to see you. He will go out of his way to make it work. But, if you’re the only one putting in the effort to make things work while he only wants to see you when it is convenient for him, that’s another sign he’s not that into you.

Basically, you aren’t a priority for him.

9. You never go out

A guy who hides you away is not into you. If you haven’t met each other’s friends, and every time you come over, he seems to keep you away from his roommate, he could be cheating on someone with you or is just not interested in any of those aspects of a relationship.

It’s not like you’re expecting him to tell the world that you’re dating, but if he spends most of his time with you behind closed doors, then you know the guy you’re dating only wants you around only when he wants company. He doesn’t really care what you want.

10. He takes casual dating seriously

This is a guy who makes it clear he doesn’t want a relationship. He may even set rules or boundaries. He’ll say things like, “we can’t do that we’re just casual,” or “this isn’t serious.” He might make it clear you can see other people or that he is not ready to take things to the next level.

Signs He's Not Into You

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